This site is about my life in the art studio. It includes drawings, paintings, knitting and cross stitch and fun art techniques. I will also include recipes and yoga to keep the mind healthy and creative.
I have not been posting for awhile. Simply because I needed a break. Most of my free time has been cross stitching. My goal is to finish Derby by February.
Also my hours at work has increased slightly as new clients are calling. I have a goal to pay off some bills this early part of the year. I will need to consider buying a car later next year.
With that being said, I decided to not move. It saddens me but I need to focus on my long term goal. The long term goal is to not work as a counselor in my 60’s, and find other work to do. Or to work from home full time in 5 years. If I got another 30 year loan, then I would have no choice but work more hours and for a longer time.
Therefore, I am staying at my townhouse. And plan on finishing updating the bathroom and kitchen.
Since it is getting colder out the neighbors have stayed inside. I’m looking forward to the cold months ahead because there’s less chance my neighbors will harass me. (I am being harassed because I’m on the HOA board) trust me we made positive changes, gave owners more freedom. Someone people are just mean and hateful and don’t want others to have freedom and happiness.
Sunday, I finished a column on Derby early. I decided to close up the house early and found my way to a canvas. Afterwards I did yoga, read the Bible and read some paragraphs about chakras. Then I went to bed at 8:30! I have been exhausted and really need the sleep. I hope this extra sleep will decrease the inflammation from rheumatoid arthritis.
Here’s the beginning of the painting. I believe it will change drastically. It might not even look like this next time you see the update.
I have items on Etsy shop. Paintings and knit headbands and scarfs that’s great for the winter.
I have been painting on a canvas for the past week. Each night instead of journalling in a notebook or in an art book, I took my journalling to a canvas.
Below is the previous journal entries in a 24″x 30″ canvas
Here’s the #6 intuitive Painting from yesterday.
I have been feeling more like myself. In the past few days decisions were made. I’m going to look into buying a home. I live in a townhouse, which I do love, but the neighbors and being on the board has caused toxic relationships to appear. I was happier here when I was not on the board. I had more free time and didn’t know what people were like here. Until now.
Yesterday, was house cleaning day. I started in my closet, took clothes to donation. And shredded papers and took that to recycle bin. In between of that, my art supplies got organized. I am happier to know that going inside a craft store is not needed any time soon. I certainly have own store!
During the evening it was relaxing, exercise and knitting. I fell asleep on the sofa. That felt great. I forgot to write and post this blog. So now it’s morning.
I will be seeing a few clients. And I will be resting maybe cross stitching. I’m glad to have my free time back.
I still want to quit being on the board, but not sure how soon I’ll find a house to buy. Until then I’m going to try to keep my peace.
Etsy shop is open. Https://4pawsartstudio.etsy.com
I’m on day 5 of intuitive Painting. I have been journalling my emotions into a canvas daily. I have been under a huge amount of stress from harassing neighbors and now increase of stress being on the HOA board.
Today I have been busy looking at homes. I am planning to sell my home and buy somewhere maybe closer to my sister.
Today was quiet. I slept for most of the day. The exhaustion level is high. As I write this at 9:30 at night, I am ready to sleep again.
This morning my voice was assertive. I told the HOA manager that I am thinking about resigning because of the bullying and not feeling at peace. I am also considering moving. I told her that I don’t want to be bothered by association issues daily. It’s unreasonable.
Here’s the thing most people here about how bad the association is at a condo or townhouse. But have you ever heard about how the board members get harassed and bullied? Probably not. There is nothing we did to cause that other than following the rules.
I’m not sure what decision I will make. Not sure if I want to move. All I know is I want peace and quiet again. That may result in me resigning. Time will tell as they say.
Here’s my journal painting on canvas tonight…
Below is a close up of tonight’s painting.
Below is the series of nights I painted on the same canvas using intuitive painting.
I have things to sort out then I can get back to making my art stronger and focus on my Etsy store.
Darkness of Anger is the title of tonight’s painting.
I am on edge. If you ever lived in a relationship of harrassment or abuse, then you will certainly understand.
Everyday there is something one of these people doing that infringes in my life. My home used to be an oasis. They destroyed it. I can’t walk my dog without constantly looking over my shoulder. They bang on doors. I will refuse to answer. They complain and want to take my personal time away. For some reason every complaint they make we must find a solution.
I used to have an evening of relaxation, watching tv, doing art, yoga. Now it’s filled with worries, constantly thinking and not feeling safe.
Has anyone lived in a community of HOA? I am on the HOA board and ever since they have been extremely rude, disrespectful and making issues as a crisis when it isn’t. I’m not sure if I want to be on this board anymore. I don’t think I can take living here anymore either.
I don’t see it ending until I quit, or I get really ill or they get bored.
So I’m fed up and ready to cry. Here’s tonight’s painting…
It’s nothing but anger depression and feeling defeated.
My latest painting is about painting intuitively. But I am using this technique to help release my suppressed feelings as I go through harrassment and bullying from neighbors. I do not deserve to be bullied and have not deliberately done anything for neighbors to feel revengeful.
Last night I left the canvas looking like this, only painted the top of the canvas. I couldn’t paint the bottom, it was like my head could only see one part of the canvas. Look at the colors and the markings are forceful on the canvas.
Tonight this is where the painting ended:
So what’s the difference between the two days. Certainly, I painted on the entire canvas.
Yesterday was emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted. It was an unless day on top of an endless week. It’s difficult to live in a community where neighbors cause safety concerns because they don’t like someone or they feel they are entitled to what they want. I had much anger suppressed in my body throughout the last week. But really it’s been there longer. However the fear is causing more harm to me. This harrassment and bullying has been going on for the entire summer. Stop the bullying, stop the harrassment.
Today, it was a calm relaxing day. I was able to cross stitch, took a nap, cleaned my refrigerator and made a fresh batch of cold green tea for the week. I did yoga and meditation before I painted this evening, it was a 10 minute evening yoga.
Here’s some close up photos of tonight’s painting.
I’ll continue to post my intuitive painting. I will be focusing back into my art for the Etsy shop this week. I’m almost finished with another ear warmer.
Today was a day of intense anger. I’m frustrated. It’s been an exhausting last few months. I feel like it will not end.
Here’s how I managed my emotions, with a 24″ x 30″ canvas, acrylic paints and my emotions.
I sat in front of the canvas and chose paint my emotion.
My emotion was anger, sad, feeling of being alone and the depression trauma and put someone in.
The plan is to paint on this canvas every night to release my emotions for about 15mins. And not be concerned about the end product. It’s like a journal entry but each time I go to this canvas I will paint over what was already painted. I will do this until a group of people stop the harrassment me and my friend and terrorizing me and my friend.
Hello, everyone! My name is Nadiia, you probably noticed, I have another blog about healthy eating and sports, it is my passion) As for this blog, I just decided to share my thoughts, my feelings. Do not judge, I am not a professional writer, I just trying to express myself.